End of the Innocence.

Went to San Francisco last weekend for my cousin's wedding-- first event I've been to in fifteen years with choreographed square dancing (the last one being my elementary school's mandatory dance unit).

It was actually really fun. I danced until I was exhausted, at which point I sat out and was joined by a creepy old guy who claimed to be married to the fiddle player. He told me his life story until the square dance choreographer announced he'd be teaching a new dance.

"Want to dance?" Creepy Old Guy asked.

Uhhhhhh.

"Ok," I said, surveying the dance floor. What was the worst that could happen in a well-lit circle of sixty square-dancers?

But when we were instructed to hold hands with our partner and swing them around, I starting thinking of ways to get out of it. Until a MIRACLE occurred. Let's just say I have never been so happy to hear that the square dance I was learning was one in which you switch partners every thirty seconds. (Especially when Creepy Old Guy pulled me in close during our first and last do-si-do and said, "Let's do it this way since it's our last time together").

The next day my family went to see Jenny's office at Mozilla Firefox and Ben's office at Idle Games. Seeing their work spaces had me SERIOUSLY re-evaluating my life choices and wondering if I should drop therapy and learn code.

Both companies provide them with all the free food, beverages, Nintendo games, and alcohol they could ever want. Shelves and shelves full, free for the taking! Mom and I got so excited that we started eating everything in sight--even though we had just had lunch--just because we could. This is how I ended up with a sickness that I termed "Mozilla Belly."

Meanwhile, back in Iowa, Doug and I have adopted a second kitten. Doug wants to name her something Greek or Navajo but in the meantime I like to call her My Sweet Little Owl Face. I brought her home Tuesday night and she promptly ran under our bed and did not come out for forty-eight hours.

Today as I was cleaning the toilet I looked over and saw Ketos literally raping My Sweet Little Owl Face in the hallway. It was quite jarring.

"I just thought he'd be my little baby forever!" I whined to Doug afterwards as he held me and sang "End of the Innocence."

I'd leave you with a picture of Owl Face, but since she's currently under our couch where she spends 90% of her time, the best I can do is leave you with a picture of our couch.

Donations Needed!

In an effort to make amends for broadcasting my BFF's poop-eating disease on the world wide web, I would like to take this opportunity to ask you all to please make a donation to the school Bevin is trying to build in Benin, West Africa.

Many kids in Bevin's village are unable to continue their educations due to lack of space in schools (when only 36% make it to 6th grade in the first place). The classrooms they do have are filled with insects and flood every time it rains.

The community itself is donating $6,000 to this project-- an extremely large sum for such a small village, which demonstrates the community's dedication to education and the futures of their children.

Your contribution will help build two new classrooms, which will increase enrollment rates (especially among girls) and enable students to earn their high school diplomas. Not to mention all the ripple effects of increased education.

100% of donations go directly to the project and all donations are 100% tax deductible.

Just think: Bevin is spending two years eating rats and poop to help out. But all you have to do is donate!

To donate, go here:

https://www.peacecorps.gov/index.cfm?shell=donate.contribute.projDetail&projdesc=680-218

If that doesn't work you can:

1. Go to www.peacecorps.gov/donate
2. Search "Kloepper"
3. Choose " An Education Starts with a Classroom"
4. Donate!

The day has come.

He made it to the top of the fridge.

No-Pants Thursday

I was walking through the woods with no pants on today. In the past three hours I had driven to work for my first session, which was canceled, driven home, and driven back to work for my second session, which was canceled. I wasn't going home with nothing to show for the day, damnit.

It was an unreasonably pleasant seventy degrees out, so I followed an intriguing sign I pass every day that points the way to "Squire Pike," where I got out of my car and found this:

(Except with less green leaves, because it is winter afterall, and I just swiped this photo from someone's online album).

Unfortunately I was wearing a dress, leggings, and nice boots. Fortunately, there is a pair of bright red sneakers in my trunk that I neglect to unpack every time I move. Unfortunately, I had no outfit alternatives and was not going to wear my dress into the muddy forest. So after some deliberation I made the call to just go out in my tank top and leggings. (Fortunately, this isn't too different from how most women dress anyway).

Best decision of my life. Beautiful trees, beautiful waterfalls, beautiful frozen lake, children trying to break the frozen lake with rocks, making me deeply nostalgic for childhood. I stayed until sunset and Doug came and joined me (and "offered" me his sweatshirt, which was basically a dress on me).

Then we went to Applebee's for some ribs, and as I watched the hostess quickly eye me up and down, I was finally able to recognize one of the benefits of not knowing anyone in this state: no risk in going out to dinner in leggings, your boyfriend's sweatshirt, bright red shoes, and purple-striped socks.